My boyfriend and I have been struggling with our sex life. He’s passive, has difficulty with mutual pleasure, maintaining erections, and often experiences premature ejaculation. I recently suggested he try abstaining from porn to see if it helps, and if not, to consider seeing a doctor. I also shared that while I understood initial anxieties, I hoped to see some improvement after six months, as we’ve only had one successful penetrative experience.
He responded defensively, claiming he felt attacked. He insisted he was healthy, citing his ability to maintain an erection for extended periods while masturbating. When I asked if my presence was the issue, he disclosed that he regularly engages in mutual masturbation with a male friend while watching porn and getting high. He described this as normal and innocent, but I was taken aback. I pressed for more information and discovered they had even used pictures of me. When I asked about the friend’s identity, he said he needed to check with him first before revealing it.
I’m troubled by this behavior and question if he’s being entirely honest or if he might be exploring his sexuality. However, the bigger issue seems to be his unwillingness to address my concerns.